STAND BACK, COMEDY!

Wrestling is an experience in drama. Whether the thrill of an incredible and hard-fought match between two gladiators or the shock and awe of an exciting storyline, it is a business that means to grip you with turmoil and adventure. Wrestling is drama personified. That being the case, what are the odds that a wrestler who's gimmick is based almost completely around comedy and never around action will flourish in this environment?

The snowball had a better chance.

Comedy, when used correctly, is an excellent tool to help a wrestler get over with the fans, but unless coupled with the proper dramatics and the occassional display of ability to pummel another grappler, the jokester will hit the proverbial ceiling in no-time. If a wrestler's gimmick is all comedy, all the time, he won't be taken seriously by both the fans, and more importantly, management. It's a matter of proper balance. "Everything in moderation," they say. I imagine at this point, good reader, you will want the necessary examples...

Chris Jericho. His debut on then-WWF television was part comedy and part drama. The newly-named Y2J cracked jokes with The Rock, but he also appeared in a fury of pyrotechnics and electric rock music. Jericho was hilarious, but he was also allowed to be a threat to the established WWF superstars. Within a matter of weeks, he powerbombed "Road Dogg" Jesse James through a table and picked a fight with Ken Shamrock, "The World's Most Dangerous Man."

The Rock. Chances are you have laughed at The Rock's thousand-and-one catch-phrases and over-the-top antics from time to time. His Rock Concert songs, while not overlly clever, were fairly amusing. Is that the heart of his character, though? No, of course not! He's The Great One. The Brahma Bull. The People's Champion. His character revolves around the idea that he is the total package. Excellent on the microphone but also in the ring. That is why he can be taken seriously even after talking about "pie."

So, after four paragraphs, I believe it's about time to reach the focus on this column. Shane "The Hurricane" Helms. In-ring talent coming out of his pores. Very much over with the fans. Innovative offense (for the WWE, anyway) and years of experience despite his young age. He could be huge. He could be a shining star on the Raw roster. He has all the makings of what could be a very successful career. Unfortunately, we're talking about today's WWE, so the smart money is he will be only slightly bigger than Spike Dudley.

Why will he never reach that next level in his current state? Because comedic characters rarely do. Even a rub from The Rock a few weeks ago couldn't maintain a solid Hurricane push. The bookers simply can't look at him and see the next big star. For a company that prides itself on being very modern and changing with the times, The Hurricane's gimmick resembles that of the ultra-campy 60's Batman television show. Live action superheroes are huge today. One need only look at movies like X-Men and Hulk to realize that. Classic superheroes given a modern feel. So, why doesn't the WWE follow the trend? Why are they giving us the 21st century version of Burt Ward?

Rather than simply rant against WWE marketing and cry about how The Hurricane isn't being used correctly, I'll go one step further. In an arrogant "I could do better than that!" move, here is a vision of my Hurricane...

Hurricane and Rosey vs. Chris Jericho and Christian. The WWE has decided to pair Hurricane with yet another partner, so we may as well make the most of it. Hurricane and Rosey put up a valiant fight, but in the end, Y2J and the Intercontinental Champion pull out the victory. The winners are not finished, though. Hurricane is set up for the Conchairto. His brains are scrambled and JR attempts faux concern. Our hero is carried away on a stretcher to the back.

Next week, Hurricane interferes in a non-title contest between Christian and...oh...let's say Maven. This is not our regular Hurricane, though. He's dressed in what appears to be street clothes. A chair shot behind the ref's back and Maven gets the pin. The week after, Hurricane appears in his new vigilante unform. Gone is the ridiculous mask. The cape is a distant memory. Hurricane now sports an X-Men movie style full leather outfit. With the mask gone, we can now actually see his face, and his hair (still green) is styled in punked-out spikes that could be best described as Billy Idol-esque. This Hurricane is tough, stylish and even (gasp!) feared by some of the mid-carders. To help this new Hurricane along, he could be given a Pay-Per-View title match against Christian. Win or lose? It doesn't matter. We finally have a Hurricane we can take seriously.

It needn't stop there, though. The Hurricane can be given a feud with the recently heel-turned Kane. The angle would write itself. The monster would continue his terrorizing of the Raw superstars until someone steps up to put a stop to it. From there, we can all use our imaginations...

It should be noted that the only time, as far as my recollection goes, that The Hurricane has been taken seriously was also the time of his greatest success. Coincidence? I doubt it. For those who remember, The Hurricane's short-lived Cruiserweight Champion reign was highlighted by the Nidia/Jamie Noble stalker angle. Noble stole Hurricane's mask only to infuriate the superhero. He charged to the ring, maskless, and chokeslammed the theif right in the middle of the ring. The video montage shown before the Pay-Per-View match made it appear even more dramatic than it was on Smackdown. Sadly, this is the only time in recent history that Shane Helms has been taken seriously.

Since the WWE doesn't always go the road of quality if the money isn't there, a renewed Hurricane makes smart business sense too. One need only look at the ShopZone website to learn that Hurricane merchandise is selling like hotcakes. More television time and an altered version of his gimmick can breed new interest in the character, which means new business. There are so many reasons to allow The Hurricane character to evolve to the next tier and so few reasons to hold him back.

Will they listen? I doubt it, but I still watch Raw every week hoping someone will look beyond Hurricane's mask and see the man who could be an incredible superstar. Here's hoping.